It was another beautiful Sunday on July 9, 2023, when the first place Sand Crabs took on the 3rd place Crawfords at the friendly confines of EMLL, in a hotly contested match in the 45+ MABL of Southern Wisconsin.  The sky was high, and so were the spirits of both squads.  The wind was blowing out to right center, and there were fans in the double-digits cheering on their favorite players, or heckling them when they didn’t perform.  But with love.  Yeah, love heckles.  That’s what they were…..

The Sand Crabs sent Wally (Mike Wallace, in case any scouts are reading this) to the mound, while the Crawfords debuted their secret weapon, Mark Holzman. Holzman, fresh out of triple-A Albuquerque, had fans questioning whether he was old enough to be in this league, as he displayed such youthful exuberance as he skipped to the mound.  As it turned out, he just stepped on an acorn in the dugout.  Anyhoo, both squads were set to battle, and battle they did.

Wally threw well; outstanding, in fact.  He held a voracious lineup of sluggers and bearded men to 9 hits over 7 innings, striking out 4 and walking 3.  4 runs were allowed, but 50% of those runs were unearned.  A lot of other stuff happened, here are a few of those things.  The Crawfords sent 3 more hurlers to the hill, while the Crabs just sent a Hill for relief of the Wall.  The Crabbers took advantage of 11 free passes, but the Crawford pitchers whiffed a half-dozen Crabs.  The daily dinger diary shows Tom Scalissi with an el grande salami in the 4th, and Mike Schoonveld with a 3-run Jack in the 5th.  Mike Kauffman hit 4 balls to the exact same spot in right center field, 2 were doubles, and 2 were singles.  He nearly snatched defeat from the jaws of victory and had to “slide” into second twice. Question: If a man is nearly standing still and drops a cheek on the ground near a base, does this constitute a slide?  If a tree falls in the forest, and that tree is Mike Kauffman, it most definitely makes a sound, and that sound is a grunt.  However, it is at least a SPOG-like grunt.  So there’s that.

Where was I?  Oh yeah.  The game.  3 time SPOG Scalissi finished with 4 knocks on the day, as did Kauffman.  Troy Galston collected 3 himself, though almost missed an at bat as he was apparently napping.  Greg O’Donnell, the retiree, barreled 4 balls and had 2 hits to show for it.

Andy Winn and Paul Meyer both had 3 hit days for the Crawfords, each with a ground-rule double to left.  Mike Starshak had a double as well, and added a single for good measure.  Final score, Crabs 18, Crawfords 5.

Both teams are in action again next Sunday, when the Crabs face the Orioles at noon, and the Crawfords take on the Rangers at 3, at Ahuska Field in Monona.  Its a good place for a cookout, and to take in a game, especially if you like traffic noise.  And who doesn’t?